Just a heads up-- this is going to be weird and filled with Too Much Information. Continue at your own risk.
I need to call the doctor tomorrow. There is something strange going on with my left breast. The nipple and areola are swollen and sore. Every once in a while I'll move and feel a sharp, tearing pain. Any pressure against the breast causes a slightly duller, aching pain. There's no discoloration or discharge. It's not warm to the touch the way you might expect from infection or inflammation.
So I did the dumbest thing a person can do-- I googled. My first thought, a yeast infection, sounds unlikely. If it were bacterial it sounds like I'd probably be having a systemic reaction, which I'm not. The thing that's left is inflammatory breast cancer, one of the most sudden and aggressive forms of breast cancer.
That's right, folks. I've diagnosed myself with breast cancer off the internet. To be fair, I have a family history of breast cancer, and the medications I've been on for Crohn's give me an increased risk of all kinds of cancer. And no, I don't really think I have breast cancer based on a few web pages. But it is concerning. Also, it really fucking hurts. So I'm calling my doctor tomorrow and getting it checked out.
Update: I have an appointment to see my doctor on Friday at 12:30.